summertime rhyme

it's raining outside
the water makes me run and hide
i don't want to ruin my hair
for a snack i think i'll eat a pear
it's crisp and sweet
quite the delectable treat
now i'm sleepy and watching tv
quick like a butterfly and sting like a bee
the batteries in my remote don't work anymore.

hee haw

this kind of idiocy makes me want to punch women and children.

spoilers barely belong on regular, everyday cars.
what makes you think that spoilers make your truck more awesome?

if i told you eating glass would make you better looking, would you believe me too?
...because it does. you should try it.

fucking donkeys.

i was driving to work today and saw a certified donkey rolling around in a big truck with a stupid, gaudy spoiler.
i hope somebody slashed his tires.

enjoy your spaghetti.

a e i o u and sometimes y

shy, my, by, try, sky, why.

my sister says melk.
she's an idiot.
pretty sure she ate paint chips as a child.


dave matthews band

so much to say, so much to say, so much to say, so much to saaayy...

so little time.

thank you for your patience.

i'll be back soon <3


30's the new 20

happy 30th birthday, post-it notes.

you barely look a day over 18.
you must have very good genes.

remind me to wish you happy birthday next year.

dr. huckstable

i saw bill cosby live, back in 2004.
it was one of the coolest experiences of my life.

i told somebody about it earlier tonight - which reminded me of the awesomeness. so, i've decided that sharing this clip with all of you is the most ideal idea.

my fondest memory of the show was, without a doubt, his dentist bit.
i literally couldn't breath, i was laughing so hard.
it felt like i was being tickled......and the person tickling me wouldn't stop - but more awesome.

here's a clip from 1983 of him doing the very same bit that i saw him do 21 years later.
the video version is funny, but it's truely something else to see it live.


rest in beats

r.i.p. guru

this seems like a good time for a mass tribute...
can you find the random 6 degrees of separation among them?

big l
j dilla
big pun

hmm...not sure where i should even begin?
well, big l was a member of d.i.t.c., which, fat joe, was also a member and fat joe and big pun were terror squad labelmates. big l's track, 'put it on' was produced by j dilla. j dilla was an original member of the group, slum village, in which baatin was also a member. dj premier, who was in the group, gang starr, with guru, produced big l's track, 'ebonics'. and, well, the super random, far fetched 6th degree, o.d.b...he was a member of the wu-tang clan, and raekwon, a current member, has sampled 3 of dilla's beats on his latest album...follow that? me neither. crazy innit?


as seen on tv

i really feel like this needs no introduction...

your welcome.

ps. god bless snl

me first and the gimme gimmes

is the greatest cover band in the history of the league.

but here are some fun bbc 1 live lounge covers for you to enjoy:

example covers ke$ha
asher roth covers black eyed peas

more asher, because i think he's neat.

hugs! hugs! hugs! hugs!
friendship! friendship! friendship! friendship!

it's better to be safe than sorry

you wouldn't want to fuck up the most important day of your life, would you?

you're welcome.


black cargo pants

john mayer, battle studies tour memoirs

these blogs are making me thirsty

thirsty for music!

i just spilled my gatorade.


itunes shuffle 10?

147) lovin' it - little brother
148) cazual drinking - classified
149) burn - mobb deep
150) so ghetto - jay z
151) phony rappers - a tribe called quest
152) killing time - no use for a name
153) we've had enough - alkaline trio
154) yesterday's feelings - the used
155) nothing better - the postal service
156) ey yey yey - the afterbeat

bonus) jefferson airplane - relient k

bounty, the quicker picker upper.


glow in the dark bikini

well, friends...
summer is fast approaching, and without a doubt, you're all very much looking forward to getting your tan on.
i know i am.
i'm paler than robert pattinson right now.

that being said, please do us all a favour, and mind your tan lines.
there's nothing worse than a haggard farmer tan...

is that mike watson??

you get the point...

see you at the beach.

magnetic, like refrigerator poetry

it's pretty cool when you google someone in your family, and this is what you find:

poems by: my cousin, david bruzina
(i just call him boku)
read his bio belowww...


When I see my friends in a different field,
I wave to them and they wave back,
but what we shout is so strange to hear,
the wind seems to carry the import of our words
to someone somewhere else.

We’re left grinning and waving, then—
because we have companions who, impatient,
want to go on with the walk and conversation—
we have to go on, almost without choosing to,
almost without noticing

this thing we’re lightly driven to do.
We look back—at whom we saw and let walk on
in a field in the evening with different companions,
remembering (as if seeing old neighborhoods
beneath their changes): someone

we once knew remaining and remaining, no matter
how long we walk and how often we look
back—until whoever’s walking with us stops
and demands we catch up, physically and in thought,
and, because that’s what we owe, we do.

poem with frogs

In a room with windows in each of four walls, a young man props his feet on the table.
The apple trees rattle.
The wind moves in waves past the garden
where okra and lettuce lie bent and bruised from the rain.

Where tomatoes and melons lie rotting.
Where the man lies rotting with wasps in his eyes.
Where nothing lies.

In a room with windows in each of four walls, a young man lies sprawled on a blanket, dreaming of frogs.
He bathes at night in a pond by a slippery elm, singing,
take them take me home foggy home froggy home.

The room has windows in two of four walls.
There are no crickets. No one sings.
Frogs troop through the fields riding the backs of iron turtles.
The apple trees snap in the high wind, split and lie down.

There is no room. No one is sleeping.
The apple trees lie like weeds in the yard.
A man sits with his hand on a calendar, turning the pages.
There is no pond.

He stands on the threshold watching the rain. There is no roof.
The crickets are singing.
The crickets are quiet.
The crickets have huge eyes.

He patches the roof and sleeps beneath it,
plants a field of melons by the pond.

There are no frogs.
He sits in a field of rain where turtles rust, says they will be waiting they
will wait forever by the river’s mud.

There are no turtles.

In a room without windows, a man sits with his thumbs in his eyes, says
I remember ribbons of dust.

There is no rain.

Says we will be found with flowers tucked behind our ears.

Says I still remember another spring
the slow wring of cast iron tears
bells in the morning seeking the blind
among tin thimbles of frost left on the hills
and trash piles burning in their little
hollows among the pines.

There were no pines.
There is no man.
The crickets remember nothing.

the division

Because I was the paper boy,
I knew when everyone was
and wasn’t in town.

I stole for fun and for the small
heavy objects I could tell
wouldn’t be missed for a long while.

The looking in ticking rooms,
the discrete rummaging
in strangers’ closets and garages

in the early mornings
of the neighborhood
I kept for myself.

I gave my girlfriends cameras.
I gave my father power tools.
I gave my mother a stained glass watch.


Escaped from God’s hidden zoo,
hunger takes up residence in you,
nibbling your patience, siphoning pride,
enjoying the warm wet conditions inside.

You tried to stop it (but were too slow).
You shouted for God (as if God didn’t know).
Now, you unclench and allow it to slither and shudder.
You feed it like a cow feeds its own udder.

If God had wanted his hunger back,
he needed to have split it from its snack
before I grew so fond of His pet
and it grew fond of me in secret.

Now, however, we’re a single creature,
neither it nor I, no student, no teacher.
Apologies, Boss, if there’s been a miscue.
There’s nothing left in this house to rescue.


"David Bruzina Ph.D. - In 2006, he held a postdoctoral fellowship at Ohio University having completed his PhD in American Literature and Creative Writing there the previous year. He also holds an MA in Philosophy from Virginia Tech, an MFA in Poetry from UNC-Greensboro and a BA in English, Philosophy and Sociology from Macalester College. From 2001-2004, he directed the Gathering Place Writing Project, which involved clients of Athens County (Ohio) Mental Health Services in the local literary community. In the summers, he continues to teach in, and direct, the "Area II" Critical Thinking and Intellectual History division of the North Carolina Governor's School (West).

A dedicated generalist with interests ranging from Southern fiction and contemporary poetry to literary theory and the history of philosophy, Dr. Bruzina enjoys exploring the relationships between literary or theoretical texts and first person extracurricular experiences.

Dr. Bruzina's poems have appeared in a number of journals, including StorySouth, Cultural Logic, From the Fishouse, Third Coast and the Greensboro Review. He has recently finished his first book manuscript and hopes it will appear in print soon. His short review (of USCA faculty member) Roy Seeger's first book The Boy Whose Hands Were Birds is forthcoming from the International Poetry Review."

source: university of south carolina aiken, faculty website.

i love my family.

how to get to third base

in celebrating major league baseball's opening week, i decided that i wanted to post and share some fun baseball related videos with all of you.

i knew i had a pretty sweet 'baseball bat tricks' video up my sleeve that i knew would be an instant favorite, but was looking for some others to satisfy my feng shui.

let's begin...

dear josh womack, you crush serious ass, don't you?

my second choice, as always, is anything by batting stance guy.

a very witty recap of the week that was, batting stance guy...

wait a second!

this video has got me thinking...

who are some other players who had/have weird deliveries or batting stances that i need to share with y'all?


here's a couple of each:

weird pitchers, past and present.
sammy gervacio (as mentioned by batting stance guy):
the one and only, hideo nomo:
and now, weird batting stances, past and present.
tony batista:
and, of course, kevin youkilis:

feng shui achieved.

have i ever mentioned that i liked sports?


is this real life?

dear jeff,

PLEASE buy kathy this for her birthday.
please buy me one too, while you're at it. i think i'd look really good. maybe in brown tho? with the fu manchu add on?
you should get one too. you'd clearly need the mario add on though.
three man wolfpack?

sincerely, booya.xo

support local music

do you like really good music? then you'll thoroughly enjoy these boys.
doin' it up real big, ya hearrddd??
listen to them here.
also, go visit my good friend, paul, while you're at it.

"i wanna go to college for the rest of my life
sip banker's club and drink miller lite
on thirsty thursdays and tuesday night ice
and i can get pizza a dollar a slice"


this was really awesome to watch:

check out the high quality version here.


live updates v3.0

dear idiot,

yes, you drive a PT cruiser.
no, it's not cooler because it's the convertible kind.

furthermore, quit driving 50 in a 60.

love, booya.xo

current random song:
bones - radiohead (the bends)

Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone on the MTS High Speed Mobility Network

i'm john mayer. you're jennifer aniston.

wednesday, april 7th, 2010.
john mayer.
mts centre.
i vote five out of five stars.

i checked his twitter account every 15 minutes that day.

but i digress...
here's the set list i compiled:

heartbreak warfare (battle studies)
good love is on the way (john mayer trio - try!)
vultures (continuum)
perfectly lonely (battle studies)
assassin (battle studies)
steve jordan drum interlude
waiting on the world to change (continuum)
stop this train acoustic w/ simon and garfunkel 'homeward bound' medley (continuum)
clarity acoustic w/ michael jackson 'human nature' medley (heavier things)
slow dancing in a burning room acoustic (continuum)
bigger than my body (heavier things)
half of my heart w/ fleetwood mac 'dreams' medley (battle studies)
why georgia (room for squares)

who says (battle studies)
gravity (continuum)

awesome. just awesome.
i loved every moment of it.

i even loved his black cargo pants.

the one song i wished he would have played:
my stupid mouth (room for squares)

songs i wish he would have played, but knew he wouldn't:
free fallin' (tom petty cover)
in your atmosphere (n/a)

songs he probably could have played, but decided not to, which kinda sucks:
neon (room for squares)
daughters (heavier things)
i don't trust myself (continuum)
crossroads (battle studies)
bold as love (continuum/jimi hendrix cover)
anything and everything from his john mayer trio album try!

i love john mayer.
read his playboy interview here.

back by popular demand

oh hello again, friends.

sincerest apologies for the lack of love in recent history.
if i told you i was in a coma, would you believe me?
a hundred hour nap?


fair enough...

let's get back into it, shall we?


welcome back

today, most people will be celebrating the resurrection of jesus, by painting eggs and eating chocolate bunnies.

others, will be celebrating the return of jon miller and joe morgan, by getting drunk and eating sunflower seeds.

i will be choosing the latter.

welcome back, sunday night baseball on espn.
oh, how i've missed you.


red bull and vodka

so, turns out it's the "biggest bar night of the year" tonight.
that being said, it's probably a safe to say a lot of ugly people are going to be having sex tonight.

to be perfectly honest...i don't need an excuse to go out and get polluted. matter of fact - i prefer the spur-of-the-moment rendez-vous for copious amounts of cocktails more so than the planned pollution.

but that's just me.

i guess it's different for ugly people?
i wouldn't know.

on that note, here's some random shit that ugly people probably came up with...

the nanerpus
dead fly art
the snuggie

i heard there's a snuggie with a dick hole in it?
can anyone confirm or deny this?

i heard that rosie o'donnell is interested in buying shares.

ps. hey cole, nice phone. loser.
pps. hey matthew, thanks. loser.

popular science

in this 'GQ' world we live in, there aren't many things more important to guys like me, than fashion and technology. everyone wants to have the freshest clothes and coolest high tech gadgets, no doubt.
(of course, everyone has their difference of opinion on what really IS fashionable these days. some guys like ed hardy. i think they're idiots. tomato, tomato, potato, potato...whatever...)
that being said...i thought, why has nobody yet tried to join these in holy matrimony? there's certainly a market for such haute couture fashions, isn't there?

i certainly believe so - and i'm positive you will too, momentarily...

step aside, michael kors.
step aside, marc jacobs.
step aside, salvatore ferragamo...

without further ado,
i give you...the most technologically advanced fashion...in the WORLD:


that's money in the bank, if you ask me.

**shout outs to cole**

yesterday's news

this just in: RICKY MARTIN IS GAY?!

this must be a joke.
there's NO way!


...i stand corrected.

he says, "I am proud to say that I am a fortunate homosexual man. I am very blessed to be who I am."

i'm pretty sure it's safe to say we knew...hmmm...when THIS came out:

but...thanks for making it official, ricky.
i'm sure there were still some people out there who had no idea...:/

in related news:

i just purchased dove's extra fresh men+care body and face bar, as well as their body and face wash.
this shit's got MICROMOISTURE technology that is clinically proven to fight skin dryness better than regular men’s body washes. This ultra-light formula delivers extra refreshment with a cooling agent, then rinses off easily for total skin comfort.

refreshingly cool. comfortably clean.

...plus it smells good.

shut up.
you know you wanna try it.